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Willson Jessop was born August 3, 2006. As a baby he was very attached to me. I nursed him for 13 months. He was contented and happy, very much “Mama’s boy.”

 

At 20 months old his carefree babyhood turned into a nightmare... The morning that he and his siblings were torn from my arms at the Coliseum, they hadn’t eaten breakfast yet, and they were half-sick from the change in diet and the air conditioner being on all the time. CPS hadn’t allowed me to cover his crib even partway to block out some of the light and cold so he could sleep. They couldn’t find his bottle when I was forced out, and vivid in my mind are his screams, with his outstretched arms reaching for me as I was marched away—robbed of my dearest treasures on earth. Lilly (his 8-year-old sister) said they didn’t get anything to eat until noon.

 

Willson was taken to Liverpool with his four-year-old brother. (His two sisters were sent to Waco, 7 hours apart.) 10 long anxious days elapsed before I was allowed to see him again, and what a change—he was not even the same warm, affectionate, charming little person. He refused to let me hold or even hug him. He just gave me a bewildered, accusing look from pain-filled eyes as if I was the one who had abandoned him. Then he shut me out and busied himself with the toys as if his life depended on it. It was just something to do so he wouldn’t have to think about it. How could I explain? What could I say to a 1 ½ year old to help him understand what had happened? I sat on the floor and tried to play with him for an hour, with CPS breathing down my neck and watching every move. He mostly ignored me. Finally, a few minutes before the visit ended, he warmed up enough to let me hold him on my lap. When they made me go and I said, “Goodbye, Son,” he gave me a half smile, waved his hand, and went back to the toys.

 

They would only let me visit one hour once a week, and it was such an oppressive atmosphere that I could hardly encourage the children, with the CPS caseworker taking notes and threatening to “terminate the visit” if she could not hear every word I said. At the third visit, CPS allowed the boys’ father in. I wondered how Willson would react to him since he had treated me so indifferently; but when his father walked in, his little face lit up like a candle in the dark. He climbed up in his father’s arms and laid his head on his shoulder.

 

  

 

 

 

 

When I picked up the boys from Kidz Harbor, they couldn’t seem to realize that they were really going home with me. My four-year-old kept watching the road; and every motor home or big truck that came along, he would ask, “Is that a bus?”   “I don’t want to see a bus.” The first day the children were back together, they held hands all day long.

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 Now it has been 6 months since the raid. Little Willson was robbed by CPS of precious time he could have had with his father, who passed away 2 months after the children returned home. His funeral was held the day Willson turned 2 years old. 

 

 

 

 

 

   

Willson still bears the effects of the separation. He is very insecure. He used to nap 2 to 3 hours. Now he has to be rocked to sleep, and then sleeps only 30 to 45 minutes before he jerks awake crying for “Muna.” At night he has to sleep in my bed. He often reaches to feel and pat my face, “Muna?” When he is sure I am there and that it is me, he kisses and kisses me and says “Wuv-u.”

 

The separation has delayed his speech. He mostly babbles, but he can say very clearly, “No,” “Don’t,” and “Mine.” If he feels wronged by his playmates, then he must revenge himself by kicking them. He is very aggressive and self defensive. The scars run deep, and it will take a lot of love to restore him to the happy, secure child he once was.

  

   

Willson had chickenpox while in state custody. He also had an earache, and an upper-respiratory infection. At one of his follow-up medical visits, they performed a SANE examination on him as requested by his ad litem. (CPS was not even aware of this examination until after it was done. Those are only supposed to be ordered by Law Enforcement on an allegation of child abuse.) I was never even told about any of those things and did not know until I picked him up from the shelter and was given some of his medical records.

 

 

I was non-suited by Barbara Walther’s court on August 22, 2008. On September 9, 2008, CPS sent me a certified letter, stating that I am a neglectful parent and that they are trying to re-suit me.