• NASDAQ 0.00
• DOW
• S&P 500 0.00

• 1 CAD = 0.9682 USD

An incident recorded in The Mosiah Hancock Journal is interesting in the light of current accusations regarding the FLDS in Texas. 

 

Mosiah Hancock was a young member of the LDS Church during the Nauvoo period. Following his account of the martyrdom of Joseph Smith and his brother Hyrum, he records the following:

 

“The Brethren pushed the work on the Temple; and the Gospel was preached; and every Saint was busy doing all he could to help the work along. Although I was very young [eleven years old], I was on guard many a night, and gladly did I hail with many of the Saints, the completion of the temple. On about January 10, 1846, I was privileged to go in the temple and receive my washings and annointings. I was sealed to a lovely young girl named Mary, who was about my age, but it was with the understanding that we were not to live together as man and wife until we were 16 years of age. The reason that some were sealed so young was because we knew that we would have to go West and wait many a long time for another temple.” (Mosiah Hancock Journal, Reprint by Pioneer Press, 3332 Ft. Union Blvd., Salt Lake City, Utah  84121, pp. 20, 21.)  

 

The FLDS people do not believe in force in any area of life. Many marriages are not consummated until months, or sometimes even years, after the ceremony is performed. The husband and wife must first learn to know, love, and trust one another. The case of Haven Barlow and Ruby Jessop, reported in Gary Naler’s “Flora Jessop: The Troubled Woman Who Cost Texas $14 Million, and Hundreds of Innocent People Their Peace and Safety,” is not unusual for this culture:

 

“Beginning in 2001, and as recent as this year, Flora has boldly claimed that on the night of Haven and Ruby’s wedding, at the age of fourteen, Ruby ‘was raped so brutally [by Haven] that she almost died from the hemorrhaging,’ and that her mother, only ‘a couple of doors down,’ was not allowed to intervene. Yet Flora is never obligated to tell her source of these repeated outrageous lies. I asked Haven and Ruby specifically about these stunning accusations; and even knowing all that I know about Flora, I was not prepared for their answer. Frankly, based on what I had read and heard, in my own mind I had formed more gracious possibilities, though still surrounding these purported accusations. But I was totally taken aback that the facts were not anywhere near what Flora has viciously spread.

 

“Did Haven brutally rape Ruby and did she almost hemorrhage to death? When I asked them if this was true, Ruby quickly answered, ‘Absolutely not! I was never raped.’ Haven added, ‘I absolutely wouldn’t do that. I’d give my life to protect her.’ Even before hearing this, two men who personally know Haven assured me that there was no way he would have done that. It was totally contrary to his nature, his character, and his upbringing.

 

“When I wrote Pat about this accusation, she confirmed: ‘Yes, I was there at the ceremony. Haven would not do these kinds of actions, let alone hurt anyone, and there is no truth in Flora's claims of any brutality.’ The fact is, Haven and Ruby had no sexual relations whatsoever that evening, or even in the days to come, and not even in the months that followed.

 

“Following the ceremony of April 23 and a brief honeymoon in Phoenix, Ruby was not settled with either herself or with marriage. As she stated, she needed time to find herself. She related, ‘I wanted to wait a little more time and see what I wanted.’ ‘It was something Ruby needed,’ responded Haven, ‘a little more time; and we gave it to her.’

 

“Over the next six months, the two of them communicated very little. When Ruby was more comfortable and sure of what she wanted, their relationship began to progress. One year later, on May 5, 2002, they were married before a judge in St. George, Utah. Ruby was sixteen years of age, and Haven was twenty-one. Only after this marriage did they ever have conjugal relations.

 

“Despite Flora’s repeated lies and accusations that marriages are forced in the FLDS and that men abuse the women, clearly this is far from true. Ruby was in fact given all the time and freedom she needed in order to make her own choice, one she was comfortable with. And consistent with the FLDS lifestyle, there was no abuse whatsoever.”

 

Gary Naler is an author and researcher who has no affiliation with the FLDS.

 

Those who judge the FLDS from the limited perspective of their own experiences almost always reach erroneous conclusions. Today’s typical practices of courtship and dating have left a legacy of premarital sex, out-of wedlock pregnancies, abortions, short-term marriages, extra-marital affairs, and divorces. The bond of trust between husband and wife needed to insure a permanent relationship often is not present. 

 

We believe that our marriages are eternal unions, inspired of God through His Prophet. We don’t discount the importance of courtship, but we place courtship on a higher, more spiritual plane and believe in courtship after marriage, not before.